A long overdue read and consequently, a long overdue rec

Considering that The Doors of Time and The Puzzle (That is Me) are two of my all-time favorite fanfics, I cannot believe it has taken me almost a year to get around to reading felisblanco's Gunpoint. Granted, I have been pretty distracted by the Merlin fandom and though I've been tracking all my favorite SPN writers and bookmarking or downloading their fic, I'm way behind in my reading.

I also have to admit I was a little scared by the summary. It sounded like a tough story: "Jensen got his childhood stolen away from him when he was ten years old. Along with his memory, his voice and every emotion that wasn’t fear, hatred or anger. Question is, can Jared help him get any of it back? And more importantly, does Jensen really want him to?" The warnings -- though honest -- were even worse. Because I have loved absolutely everything felisblanco has written, I knew I would love this, but I had to be in the right frame of mind to start it.

Apparently yesterday I was. I started reading yesterday afternoon, read straight through until late last night, read before getting ready for work this morning, and finished it tonight as soon as I got home. I am saving the timestamp* as a reward to myself for writing something about it more substantial than, "hey, it was great!"

Nothing in my life or the lives of anyone I am close to comes close to the experiences Jensen has in this story, so I cannot pretend to know if what she writes is an accurate portrayal of how he might react. All I can say is that it feels true. Jared, too, with his eighteen-year-old naive optimism in the face of the obvious challenges inherent in a relationship with Jensen also feels true. I believed in every step (forward and back) in their developing relationship. I believed in the people that surrounded Jared and Jensen, in the stresses and the challenges of their lives, in the victories, both large and small, they had over these challenges. That's all I really ask of a writer, that he or she make me believe. (Okay, I also ask that he or she make me believe while writing complete and grammatically correct sentences, but I never have to worrry about that with felis.)

I was deeply moved while reading it and reflecting on it now is causing me to well up again. But don't let the emotional impact deter you. There are many moments of real humor (hey, Chad's in it!) and many, many moments of pretty hot sex. As usual, with her work, you get the whole package.

A shout-out must go out to winchestergirl, who created many pieces of lovely (and sometimes frightening) art, which are an integral part of the story. The art is incorporated into the story at AO3, but can also be found in a separate art post.

If it isn't clear by now, I strongly encourage you to read this story, if you haven't already.

*I have the timestamp saved on my computer, but cannot find it at felis_fic or her ao3 account. So maybe she can comment and let you know where it is?